Product Lore
You don’t need a backstory when you’ve got a bastard sword.
Every party has one. The loot ninja chaotic asshole. The one who ends 90% of social encounters with their greataxe. Maybe it’s you. Maybe it’s the whole party...
You were supposed to escort a merchant caravan. Somehow the tavern’s on fire, the barkeep is dead, and the orphanage has been “liberated” of its tithes. Again.
Three hours of town roleplay? This is supposed to be a game isn't it? Kill stuff. You're not ruining immersion, you’re the reason it’s fun!
Inspired by the iconic Marlboro logo and rebranded for the chaotic-neutral soul who never learned the difference between “questgiver” and “lootbox,” this shirt is a loving roast of every player who said, “Sure, I’ll be a bard,” and then got bored during the exposition.
Wear it to your next session and become instantly recognizable as the party’s biggest liability—and greatest weapon. Let the world know you’re not here to talk. You’re here to roll initiative.
Printed on ultra-comfy unisex cotton that’s built to survive tavern brawls, angry DMs, and real-world Mondays. Available in all mortal sizes.
Buy now. Loot later. Don't apologize.
From June 2025 - D&Double-Takes
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Divine Smite - Paladin Tee
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Let customers speak for us
Absolutely smashed it, just like a true smite
I really enjoy this sight and I appreciate the artist sharing video of them designing the art pieces. Makes me have alot more buyer trust and confidence.
I actually got this for my boyfriend and he loves it. He did say it isn't the softest hoodie material, but it is thick good material and he is super pleased with it.
I love all the designs on the shop, and I keep coming back to get more shirts to add to my closet.
Love the design and the soft fabric. I was ish it came in 5xl, but the 4xl seems to fit pretty okay, just a little snug, but I'm sure I'll feel better after a few washes.
Great shirt!
It took no time to get my items to the point I was surprised when they showed up.
Very soft, loved the graphic!
Reality is Negotiable - Wizard Tee
My friend said it fit great and the fabric was super soft! Screen printing seemed high quality. Overall super pleased with it!
The colors pop so sharply from the black fabric. I nearly wept when I first saw the shirt as it reminded me of the times I was lost for words when trying to soothe those in mourning. Wearing the shirt helps give me catharsis for myself and my failures while inspiring me to be what the aggrieved near me need me to be.
I play a paladin and I smite first, ask no questions. This old tyme theme sells itself.
I cannot get enough of this product line. Was feeling like i needed to be that killer DM.
Reject Modernity - Barbarian Tee
This was a really cool series of t-shirts. I currently own four from the Reject Modernity collection, and the quality of the inking is very nice. I enjoy wearing these shirts a lot. Thank you and I hope you have more fun designs to come.
What customers think about the store
Store offers high-quality t-shirts with creative, niche designs, particularly D&D and gaming themes. Customers praise soft fabric, vibrant prints, and fast shipping. Excellent customer service with responsive support and easy exchanges. Sizes run slightly smal...